Super Bowl Recap

What a Super Bowl huh!?!?!  If you liked it, you are one of two people, a Pats fan (bandwagoners added circa 2002) or you REALLY hate the Seahawks (I really can’t blame you on that).

 

If you hated the Superbowl you are one of three people, a Seahawks fan (bandwagoners added circa 2012), you REALLY hate the Patriots (can’t blame you) or you are an overly horny man or woman, disappointed in Katy Perry’s attire…we all feel your pain.  ..

 

Below you are going to witness history, I have enlisted my good friend (one of the best!) Kyle Jensen.  Where we will be discussing a few topics from this Super Bowl as well as the 2014 season.

 

To avoid any confusion, my opinion will be after the name “Jeff” and Kyle’s will be after the name…”Kyle”.

  

STUFF FROM THE NFL SEASON THAT INTERESTED US…AND STUFF

  

1. Super Bowl 49 (no roman numerals here, not on this site!)

Jeff:

We’ll start with the actual football game itself, sprinkle in opinion on the half time show and, of course, bring up the now classic ending.  The WORST CALL this year in the Super Bowl, or any Super Bowl really…why was Katy Perry so covered up!?!?  Seriously!  She also rode in on Battle Cat!

 

 

Not to mention she danced with sharks, so it was a stoners dream for a half time show.  Bringing back Kravitz and Missy “Misdemeanor” was pretty sweet…I guess.  Would’ve preferred Snoop or Yeezus, but whatevs… also she looked A LOT like Bam Bam Bigelow yesterday.

 

 

Minus bald head…although that would’ve been a cool GI Jane type look.  Oh and the game?

 

Game was great…back and forth the whole game, more than likely one of the best football games ever, Super Bowl or no Super Bowl.  Just a crazy ending, the Pats going up, the usual, improbable, Seahawks comeback, the juggle catch (also known as The Antonio Freeman catch) and of course one of the worst calls in NFL history to close the game.

How you don’t just keep feeding the ball to Lynch the rest of the game… was weird.  Either Pete Carroll had some money on this score in Vegas or he really hates Beast Mode and wanted his boy Wilson to get the glory.  Was Brady actually the MVP?

 

Kyle, your thoughts?

  

Kyle:

The halftime show started out looking like the opening ceremonies of the Beijing Olympics basically.

Then it ended looking like a mix between an after school special and the movie “A.I.” The biggest disappointment of the night was that they believed bringing Lenny Kravitz and Missy Elliot was enough. I am willing to bet Sisqo had some free time to show us some authentic thong appreciation via a very melodic tune.

The game started out as expected, boring. The first half of the game essentially looked like the entire season for the Seahawks. The Seahawks almost got shutout in the first half for the second game in a row. Their games are so low scoring (due to an incredible defense) that even the 2013 Cubs would have been jealous (and I am a Cubs fan).

The Seahawks have by far the worst bandwagon fan-base I have ever seen in my almost 30 years of being awesome, yet bandwagoners are the fans who discredit baseball for being “boring” because of an apparent lack of offense. So I find it ironic that these bandwagoner fans choose to root for the most boring team in football. But I digress, they burned their ironic Ricky Watters jerseys and are now waiting to don their Marcellus Butler jerseys (whoops, I mean Malcolm Butler, I already forgot his name).

That said, Tom Brady looked like Tom Brady. Throughout the season there were three QB’s who qualified to have been dubbed “The Man” on their particular team; Aaron “The Man” Rodgers, Andrew “The Man Until AFC Championship” Luck, and Tom “The Man Who Is Still Married To Gisele Bundchen But Also Has a Kid With Bridget Moynahan” Brady. Brady was impressive and deserved the MVP award after ripping apart a secondary that had been feared by quarterbacks all season. Oh, and Tom is also still married to Gisele Bundchen.

Oh yeah..the “worst call” ever. Pete Carroll made a play-call at the end of the game that didn’t work out for him so every single “expert” on the matter is going absolutely crazy, but if the play had worked out for the Seahawks, every single “expert” would still be going absolutely crazy. The end.

2. Over-analyzed stories this year from THE. NATIONAL. FOOTBALL. LEAGUE

  

Jeff:

I know what you’re thinking?  WHICH ONE!?  This year has unquestionably been the worst year in backlash aimed at the NFL.

Only a few years ago, very few things made me angry about the NFL: Merril Hoge’s ties, Chris Berman talking, same for Terry Bradshaw and any Frank Caliendo skit…any of them.

The past few years though, my god.  Arrests are up, Ray Rice and elevators do not mix, AP should’ve definitely wrapped it up on a few occasions, spousal abuse, concussions (Russell Wilson def had one the Packers NFC Championship Game Kyle) and Roger Goodell just being…an awful human being.  Add in the numerous NFL analysts for THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE and it just gets unbearable.  (Subtract one from today with Warren Sapp getting all Hugh Grant on us and picking up a stripper).

 

They even gave Caliendo MORE TIME ON ANOTHER NETWORK!  WHY ESPN!?!

 

This morning Johnny Football was announced to being in rehab, so now we get that for a few months.  We get to see Skip and Steven A. arguing about the end of the Super Bowl amongst other, overblown, topics.  Get to see numerous mock drafts where nothing is accurate, but they’ll lead you to believe it and get to see more Ron Jaworski…him and Herm Edwards… just go away for a while.

You agree Kyle?

  

Kyle:

I’m going to stop you right there Jeff. Frank Caliendo’s skits were by far superior to that of Rob Riggle’s on the Fox Network. Seriously, did you watch any of them? I can’t even think of an analogy sufficient enough to truly make fun of Riggle’s apparent “comedic” genius.

The most over-analyzed story of the year is not just simply one single issue, but all of the speculation and analysis after each game, every single week on Mondays. Seriously, when the Packers lost Week 1 to the Seahawks, every “expert” all but wrote the Packers off. When the 49ers dismantled the Cowboys in Week 1, everyone was calling for the entire Cowboys staff to be fired, and the 49ers were a Super Bowl contender again (but as Jeff knows, the 49ers didn’t even make the playoffs).

Then comes Week 2, the Packers win and they’re “back on track.” It’s awful. You lose one game in September and all hope is apparently lost. Not to mention, we will start seeing mock drafts for 2016 when the 2015 draft is still months away. I refuse to watch First Take now, they only say outlandish stuff knowing that “meathead” fans will take them seriously, then those fans will use their wonderful sense of syntax onto Twitter so they can message Stephen A. and Skip. I would rather read YouTube comments.

Jeff:  

I am guilty of two things you brought up Kyle.  1. After week 1, definitely thought the 9ers were going to the promised land, just ask Ben Dangel.  2. I may have looked at the 2016 class already for the draft.  WHAT OF IT!?

Also you’re right, I completely forgot about Rob Riggle…he is just…the worst.  He will be on ESPN in a few years, this is why I watch CBS’s pregame, or no pregame at all!  Awful.

3. Are we rooting for laundry, and if so, why are we rooting for laundry?  We should root for Tide if anything!

 

Jeff:

My love of the 49’ers this year is well documented, but at the same time, it’s been my hardest year as a fan.  Multiple arrests for people on the team, horrible management decisions….”close eyes, deep breath”, and I’ve been spoiled the last few years, but finishing 8-8 when you’re a Super Bowl team, is so frustrating.

 

Years before that, they were the worst NFL franchise in the league, no question, Jacksonville and Oakland looked at them and laughed, at how bad they were.  Then they get a coach, they win, they get their new stadium, after rumors of moving to L.A. and then they fire the coach…a top coach…. to what?  Save a few bucks?  Make life easier for going to work?  Newsflash I’m not best friends with all my coworkers either, but if they do a good job, they don’t lose their job and go to the University of Phoenix and get paid more.

 

Also what’s upsetting, rumblings of teams moving again, what happens to the fans of those teams?  Does a 48 year old Rams or Raiders fan just switch teams, after sticking with both for over 10 years of futility?  Just because they can’t get a new stadium?

 

 

I get that Los Angeles thing, but the league, in ALL OF SPORTS, is the most popular it’s ever been.  So then in 10 years, maybe the Jags move to one of the spots that will lose a team, and restart the process.  Kyle?  Jensen??

  

Kyle:

I am OK with a team moving if need be. Sure, it hurts for the fans and I can empathize with them, especially since St. Louis has already lost an NFL team. But in the end, this really is a business. If Stan Kroenke feels moving the Rams back to Los Angeles is the way to go, I would probably trust his business decision than that of the same “meathead” fans I endearingly referred to earlier.

 

 

I really could not imagine even watching the NFL anymore if the Packers were to move elsewhere or disband so fans in St. Louis must be on edge. But hey, fans in St. Louis have the Cardinals! A team that has given them plenty to be happy about the past decade. Try being a Cubs fan. Seriously, try it. It is not good for your cardiovascular system, but I do it anyway. We know that no team will be moving to Los Angeles for now, but that doesn’t mean it won’t happen. However, any ideas for team nicknames if Jacksonville moves to London? Maybe they can play off of the New England Patriots’ name and call themselves the London Tyrannical Monarchs? Just a thought.

  

Jeff:

Haha I love the tyrannical monarchs, that’s great.  Bill Simmons had Werewolves of London, that’d be cool.  Or the London Callings I like!

 

Good point on best for business, it’s funny I’m defending a St. Louis team that actually stole the Rams from L.A…but holy shit, it’s the Rams and Raiders wanting to move all over again, then why move in the first place?  Let’s put a bid on a team and just have it be in Canton.  Canton, SD.  We’ll take monetary offers for best name.

    

4.  What even matters anymore?

    

Jeff:

If anything, the Super Bowl last night showed the following.  You can have the most tarnished product, run by complete assholes, played by an overwhelming majority of dick bags…and get the highest ratings for a Super Bowl in the history of the sport.

 

None of it matters.  Balls could be deflated…Pats won a Super Bowl, who cares, they’ll just lose a draft pick they would’ve traded anyway.  AP messes up….who cares, top 10 fantasy player next year bro!

 

It’s shitty and crappy, because I love watching football.  I love fantasy football…a little too much.  And I”ll keep doing it, but holy crap, for how long? It’s getting really hard to root for these people.  I like Marshawn Lynch, but even a few years ago, didn’t he run over someone with his car?  Big Ben?  Ray Rice?  Aaron Hernandez was gonna be great, and he killed people!  Got a trade offer two weeks later.

 

Kyle you brought up a great point, how baseball got the shaft for YEARS because of steroid use, bad ownership, the ’94 strike was also a huge factor, but yet the NFL has the same problems and it doesn’t get so much as a peep.

What’s the reason for that?

        

Kyle:

What matters now? Money. The NFL is a non-profit organization that rakes in billions (seriously, billions!) of dollars every year.

Even Dr. Evil is getting a little uncomfortable just thinking about it. If word about concussions becomes too mainstream, kids stop playing football (because parents will not allow it), therefore the best athletes are not playing football. So the quality of play goes down, and people start to tune out.

The best thing the NFL could have done during the wake of the discovery of Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy was to work with the doctors who wanted to curb the disease. It was irresponsible and reckless for the NFL to downplay the seriousness of the findings, and then go as far as to try and disprove the validity of CTE. But we don’t even need to look at recent events such as “Deflategate” or the domestic abuse issues that have been brought up this season to show just how much fans truly don’t care about these issues.

Just look at the 2011 season. The season that almost started late due to a lockout. The owners and players grappling with each other over a collective bargaining agreement that really turned pretty nasty. The fans were very upset with both sides, calling them greedy, yet the true reason fans were upset was that the ability to watch football on Sundays was in jeopardy. These fans couldn’t bear the thought of not being able to watch their favorite football team play, they couldn’t stand not being able to scream at the T.V. pretending to understand what “Omaha” means.

Conversely, baseball was almost destroyed due to the ’94 strike (which also included cancelling the World Series that year). Baseball then made a comeback in the ’98 season during the home run chase between Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire. Then allegations of steroids hit and everyone got mad at baseball again, calling everyone cheaters. In the NFL, use of steroids is so obviously evident that the fans literally do not care. We hear reports of players being caught using PEDs in football, but we still watch every single Sunday, buying into the product the NFL provides.

It’s almost as if the NFL is one of those entities that is now “too big to fail.” But if the NFL does fall, it will fall hard. I think it is possible that the issues surrounding the league this season were just fore-shocks before the big earthquake hits. So beware NFL, you can’t be infallible forever (just look at the history of baseball).

Jeff:

I agree, something is going to happen eventually that will curb the popularity of the NFL.  Maybe in the next 10-15 years.  That, or with all the actual danger with the sport, it turns in to a crazy game of flag football and fantasy football gets CRAZY (Bazemore has already offered 2 trades!)

Other sports are coming back, baseball is gaining steam again, the NBA is always there, maybe soccer/futbol will finally take off.  Things come in waves, and the NFL has been the biggest game in town for over 20 years.  Things will change, and hopefully for the better.  I love that you brought up “too big to fail” because it almost is, but some cracks are starting to show.  The Super Bowl is so successful because it’s not like the other sports.  It’s a shorter season that ends in a one game winner take all, as opposed to a best of 7 like the other sports.  But if enough cracks start to form, it’s due to fall, and I’m wondering when that breaking point will be?

I say we do a part 2 sooner than later?  As usual, thanks for reading everybody!  This one was a blast.